Thursday, August 25, 2005

I Died For My Beliefs..

Islam and Christianity are assemblies of jaded public school boys, and Martyrdom is their blood sport.

Christians were bound to have the edge. They turned up just as Islam was entering full conquer 'n' convert mode, and their laws against blasphemy were without fail severely executed.

Romans also were not too fond of the "renegade Jews". Jesus Christ is notorious for being the first Martyr of Christianity, quickly followed by his closest friends and followers the apostles; Paul, Philip, Mathew, James the Great (re: concerning greatness in deed and action), Mark, Andrew, Chad, James the Less (re: concerning tiny penis), Jude, Bartholomew, John, etc. etc.

At the time, Christians were either to be crucified in the same manner as Roman political prosoners or eaten by lions as a circus spectacle. What if JC should have died through bowel dislodgement by angry quadrupeds? Would the cross be replaced with stylish animal print? Would there be far fewer cat blogs today? Just how far can one man carry a lion?

History is littered with the severed body parts of neophytes.

I died for my beliefs to get a woman to sleep with me!

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