Friday, August 26, 2005

My Favourite Animal Is The Hyy Ztrezhrtezt..

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

First message received after putting profile up on a singles site;

Message received on 8/26/2005 6:27:00 AM

cherry hello
i am miss ullia i saw your profile at today after going through it i think that you are the type of person i am looking for so i will like you to mail me back through my mailing address thus;, thanks i am awaiting for your soonest respon.

Her profile lists these as her 'favorites';

Favorite Music; Jazz
Favorite Band; tgtrgea
Movie; fhaj yt
Actor; juyer hafetzyr
Animal; hyy ztrezhrtezt
Hero; itriu jt
Place; z tryt"้งป

All very exotic, and surprisingly we share a number of things in common.

Anyway desperate times... my reply;


Your name is pretty because it sounds like my favorite part of a woman are unreliable creatures though I expect different from you are from Senegal which is in Africa where I've never been to tell you the truth I'm looking for a wife someone like you maybe but a little taller but that doesn't matter so long as your face is pretty girls always turn on you look good in heels what about in profile or reflected in the ceiling mirror of a japanese love hotel every chance I get when I come here to stay for just one day we should meet and talk through your interests are so interesting people make interesting partners don't you think your profile is difficult to make out please attach a photograph to this mail handed to us while while sit on a beach in Dubai sipping daiquiris together hand in hand under the blue note was one of Miles' strongest recordings in my opinion have you heard of frotting before we meet better tell me do you prefer your men cut or with foreskin?

Richard M Suave Esq.

Fingers crossed.

My favourite animal is the Hyy Ztrezhrtezt to get a woman to sleep with me!


At 5:26 AM, Blogger Dr. E. Scientist, phD. said...

I find the fact that I understood your response very disturbing.

On the other hand, if Miss Ullia e-mails me, I might just have a chance, although I am not fond of hyy ztrezhrtezts as they piss all over the place.

At 10:53 AM, Blogger Gorilla Bananas said...

But I hear that juyer hafetzyr is a great actor and it's a scandal he didn't win an oscar for his role in 'Last duingo in Gurys'.

At 6:20 AM, Anonymous Richard S. said...

Whatever language that is it must be rather difficult to pronounce. I don't know how I sahll communicate with her family.

Wait a minute, apparently her family is dead.

Well that's a relief.

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